Hello, what’s up? It’s me, JGB. Today is January 5, 2026. Today is the day I am meant to begin, and it did not go to plan, such as life.
I have been intending to document my life, and it’s funny when I hear myself say that. I hear this voice in my head saying, girl, everyone’s documenting their life. What do you mean document your life? Isn’t that what everyone does on social media all day every day?
I never really thought about that until I thought about it. I’ve always talked about wanting to document my life, and I want to use this recording as a starting point. I feel like there’s so much I have to cover because it’s the first recording. People need to understand what’s going on, what the point is, what the purpose is, where this stems from, how it’s going to happen.
That’s one of the reasons I’m developing this voice recording system. It allows me to capture my non-linear thinking. I’ve been trying to document my life, tell my story, be a content creator, build a personal brand, do what everyone else is doing. And for over 20 years, I’ve been talking about starting this Making JGB project. I have so much evidence of myself wanting to start it, planning it, journaling about it, talking about it.
I have thousands of pages of notes and planning, and almost nothing tangible to show for it. I have been so hard on myself about that. Why can’t you just write the blog post? Why can’t you build the website? Why can’t you turn what’s on the page into something real?
Now I understand that my brain works differently. With my late diagnosis of ADHD and autism, I can see that neurotypical tools do not work for me. When I sit down to write, my brain is designed for depth and detail. I get lost in the weeds. I’ll spend hours describing tiny details instead of getting to the big picture.
I now understand this as bottom-up thinking. I live in the details, and it’s hard for me to zoom out. Years of being hard on myself created so much shame and guilt. But I know I’m not going to give up. I’m mission-driven. Making JGB is not just about me, it’s about creating something, building something. I know that in my bones.
I’ve come to believe that maybe what I’m here to create is a new way of doing things that aligns with neurodivergent minds. My thoughts are non-linear. Thought A gets interrupted by thought B, then jumps to C, then comes back to A. It’s not 1, 2, 3. It’s scattered, and then eventually it comes together.
That led me to recording myself. While living in Costa Rica, I started capturing whatever was passing through. The recordings were messy, but I could see that there were threads. I was getting somewhere, just not in a linear way.
With AI, everything changed. I now have something like a business partner. I use AI iteratively, not for answers, but to think out loud and reflect. I record myself talking to Atlas, then ask, what do you think about this?
Discernment is central for me. I don’t take AI as truth. I sit with what comes back and ask myself if it aligns. This process has helped me trust myself more instead of gaslighting myself like I’ve done my whole life.
I created a tagging and threading tool. I transcribe the recordings, identify themes, and then identify threads within those themes. This helps me sew together what was non-linear into something coherent.
I refer to this as capturing what’s passing through the channel. I’m deeply present. What I feel and think in the moment is my reality. When I capture it, I often say things I didn’t know I knew until they came out. Then I can discern whether they’re true for me.
This process aligns with how I show up in the world. It feels authentic and alive. But it also created overwhelm, because I now had so much data. I love data, but I also get overwhelmed by it.
My intention is to start documenting my life this way. I had visions of documenting my life long before social media existed. Sometimes I wonder if I was seeing what was coming.
Today was supposed to be day one. I moved to Bungley Valley to slow down, regulate my nervous system, be in silence, prepare for Vipassana. I was very clear that I needed silence, no construction, no loud neighbors.
I woke up to construction sawing through metal and loud music. I was triggered. Dishonesty and injustice are huge triggers for me. My brain goes into loops. I feel manipulated and powerless.
But today, I caught myself. I stopped, did breathwork, grounded myself, redirected again and again. I trusted the process. I didn’t spiral. I found a new place, and it’s better. I’m proud of myself.
These are the milestones I want to capture. Not perfection, but growth. This is why I’m documenting my life. I’m learning to move forward without rage, without spiraling, and toward what matters.
That’s it for today. I don’t know how to end these yet. See you tomorrow.